But I began to fear the world and all that was in it. It was suppose to be an age of innocence. Stolen by the fear of weather or not I was going to be yelled at when I got home from school every day. I knew this was wrong...I was not suppose to fear like this. But long ago I took the role of survivor instead of playing the victim. I finally came to terms with the fact all that I endured was "abuse." And I over came that. No matter how many times I was told I was nothing,no matter how often I was told I was worthless,and no matter how often I was screamed at and threatened for doing innocent things,I knew he was wrong.
And whenever I heard the yells,or breaking of furniture,I would sneak my way outside no matter what time of day or night. And I would Look up and wish on everything that lit up.
Even airplanes.
I finally got my wish and I know after so long.
Everything is going to be okay.
I'm going to be okay. And I know that there are people who care about me no matter what. I have learned to love myself in general. And I have opened up. I finally find it in my heart to trust someone. That fear is being replaced by innocence once again.
I am growing happier by the day.
Not saying I don't get down,I am only human. Stuff happens,but all is never lost.
And when I "grow up" I know that it will not be about what I am but how I am.
I've got a lot of growing up to do still and I know what I want to be "when I grow up" but that is irrelevant,because I know how I want to end up is happy.
A strange and simple concept.
And to think this huge revelation all started with me pretending that airplanes in the night sky were shooting stars.
